Out on the Wire

We went and saw Brandon Flowers play the other night and as expected, it was better than expected. Everything struck hard, creating such a positive sense of energy, I would challenge even the snobbiest snob to deny the pure joy and talent Brandon spewed across the audience. Every aspect was great, but even still, there were a couple specific moments that reminded me what exactly it is that makes live music so good. During Only the Young, the power of the drums and bass was pouring out to the point where your body is beating to the same tempo as the song, not just your foot or hand, but your heart and adrenalin. Everything is in sync and it’s exhilarating. Then on the last song before the encore (ps, how annoying are encores? I’m all about ending the encore and fully respects any musician who feels similarly – here’s looking at you John Vanderslice) he played Playing with Fire which was definitely the song that grew on me the most from the album but listening to it via car stereo hardly compares to the magnitude of a live version. It just felt so big and made me want to burst out into tears. Just seeing what people are capable of creating is sometimes a little overwhelming for me – especially when it comes to a live performance of a song with backup singers, and harmonies, and multiple instruments, and lights, and great lyrics, and all of it, and how much it’s able to affect people. I cannot fathom having that capability/power. I’ve always been somewhat unhealthily envious of people’s creative abilities. To add something to this world that not only didn’t exist before but that can connect emotionally to other people, strangers even. And although I desperately crave the ability, adding something to the world so inherently unique seems completely out of grasp and foreign. Which makes me think that despite my grave hesitancies and fears to have children, I’m completely in love with the idea and unwaveringly committed to do so since it may be my only shot at creating something completely great. And now I’ve gone from a Brandon Flowers show to the inner fears and complexities of childbirth. I think I’ll end here.